Beautiful Disaster

A sweet friend asked me the other day how my trip here in Africa was going so far, and the only word I had to describe it was "contradiction." Contradiction is everywhere. One way I look and see huge piles of trash with people and animals digging through to see what they can find,
 the other way I look and see beautiful beaches and trees and sunsets. 
One minute I feel frustrated and scared and desparately wanting to come home to the comfortable life I know, and the next minute I feel so much JOY and happiness when I am laughing and playing with the cutest African kiddos. Abrupt poverty, disease, and terrorism are everywhere. But at the very same time, there is so much humility, gratefulness, and passion in the hearts of the people here. Really, it's a beautiful mess. 


For me, this adventure has been more than just a vacation. 
Yes, I've been very lucky to travel the world this way. I've been on African safaris, visited beautiful beaches, 
ridden camels, and seen many historical sites. I am blessed. But, during the week, I spend my time working with children who've been struck with diseases or infection, who've never been able to or have lost their ability to communicate. When I began this journey, 6 weeks seemed like a long time to be away from my friends and family back home--and most days it still does. But now, when I realize that I only have almost 3 weeks left here... it feels very short. I want so much to have God use me in the ways he has planned for me and the familes whom I am serving. But some days it is very easy to become discouraged. As a speech therapist, my skills are challenged. As a Christian, my faith is challenged. There are times when a new child comes in who is 6 and has no expressive language, and is still struggling to walk, and I think "Where am I supposed to start?"!! And how do I tell a parent in a country where speech therapy is almost unheard of that I am here to help their child and their family, but only for 2 more weeks, then I'm leaving? Some days, if I can make just them laugh, I've done my job...


So as I took time to reflect on my experience this week, I came across this quote. It humbles me and reminds me of my intentions and why I am really here...
"Perhaps we must continually remind ourselves that the first commandment requiring us to love God with all our heart, all our soul, and all our mind is indeed the first. I wonder if we really believe this. It seems that in fact we live as if we should give as much of our heart, soul, and mind as possible to our fellow human beings, while trying not to forget God. At least we feel that our attention should be divided evenly between God and our neighbor. But Jesus’ claim is much more radical. He asks for a single-minded commitment to God and God alone. God wants all of our heart, all of our mind, and all of our soul. It is this unconditional and unreserved love for God that leads to the care of our neighbor, not as an activity that distracts us from God or competes with our attention to God, but as an expression of our love for God… We might even say that only in God does our neighbor become a neighbor rather than an infringement upon our autonomy, and that only in and through God does service become possible." -Henri Nouwen

I want to thank each one of you for your constant thoughts and prayers for me and the people I'm serving. Being here, I have learned a life-time of valuable lessons and gain a little more perspective on life each day. I have so much to be thankful for!


Love you :)